Just got back from a screening of the movie Race to Nowhere sponsored by the Medina Elementary PTSA at Sammamish High. After the screening,  a nice panel, including psychiatrist Laura Kastner and self-styled, education reformer Scott Oki took questions.Very thought provoking evening… Not many answers but, lots of things to consider.

1. I was very pleased when Ms. Kastner mentioned that the film was a collection of anecdotes and while very emotionally powerful, not necessarily a balanced account of the situation. I thought this was a very, very apropos comment. Even while watching the film, I lost track of the times my adult brain told me “yeah, but you’re just a kid and have no real idea about life yet.” in response to comments by one teen or another.

While I GET IT, (I DO see the lunacy of the situation.) I also have always been a proponent of aiming high to achieve more than aiming low. While kids may feel pressure, I’m not sure that is completely unhealthy. What is unhealthy is the belief that failure to get Straight A’s in all AP classes and admission to Stanford is the end of life. First off, it is NOT essential to have straight A’s to go to Harvard, Stanford or Yale. Second, none of those schools are educationally any better than 20 or 30 other schools.  Further, given a better FIT with a given student any of a few HUNDRED schools could be every bit as good for that student. Finally, failure is part of life, not the end of it. Any parent that allows their teen to believe that it is “all about Stanford” is doing a terrible job of parenting. On the other hand, any parent that allows their child to coast, play games excessively, not get good grades or not apply themselves (in the name of a “happy” childhood or any other goal) is also not doing their job.

2. Mr. Oki mentioned his new organization (not yet launched) ParentUnion.com that will unify parents into an effective educational reform force. Given the debates between parents I’ve seen, where beliefs are often dearly held and diametrically opposed, I’m not sure how he is going to get enough unity to achieve anything but, I will certainly do anything I can to help such an ambitious project starting up right here in Washington. He highlighted a few absurdities in the current Public School system: One, the fact that in Japan there are something like 6 teachers to one administrator whereas here in America, it is not even a one to one ratio…. anther was something about there being over 200 school districts in Washington, two of which have less than 8 students!!! I bet those two have more than 8 employees each!!!

3. Homework… particularly thorny subject for me since I have a kid that is doing 3-5 hours of homework EVERY night at least six days a week. I believe that frequent (nightly), short (15-30 mins) assignments is, BY FAR, the best way for kids to learn their basic math facts. I also think that writing is an evolutionary process needing practice and refinement. For at least both these subjects, I believe that working at home is a reasonable expectation and an efficient use of class time. The issues of dioramas,”projects” and other “artsy” time-wasters was brought up.

I wish I had been able to take the mic at some point in order to point out that: At least until high school, parents need to understand that kids grades do NOT follow them. If your kid is stressed over a project then help them or send a note to the teacher that you, as their parent, have given them permission to skip this assignment. They probably will get a big fat F, but SO WHAT??? At the end of the semester they’ll have a B, they’ll respect you for standing up for them and they’ll understand that life is more than grades.

4. AP Classes… one or more of the panelists mentioned how hard Bellevue School District personnel works to force EVERY kid into EVERY AP class. I agree, understand that there is evidence that taking AP classes raises the possibility of going to college, but the pandering to rankings of Bellevue School District is NOT healthy. FORCING a kid with a documented, reading disability into 4 AP classes as a junior then absolutely refusing to reschedule him is NOT a decision that was made with the kid’s best interests in mind. In this case, the kid’s parents DID squawk and he eventually was excused from one of the AP classes and given extra support for another. I believe that parents need to make advocate for their kids. Why we let a school district dictate class loads is beyond me. The fact is, colleges are NOT in love with AP classes. They want a kid to “take advantage of what is offered at their schools” that does NOT mean taking EVERY AP class. That means taking a good selection of courses AND finding a passion!!! Kids with great grades and AP classes that play the piano or violin and soccer get turned down from the top schools all the time. I believe that a kid with a couple of warts but a demonstrated PASSION for something amazing is more attractive to the top schools than Mr./Ms. Perfect. If your kid is over-scheduled, it’s YOUR responsibility as a parent to step up and help them work it out.

5. A few times in the movie and a couple times in audience comments, tutoring was mentioned as one of the things that was ADDING stress to a student’s life. I’d like to point out that at least at MY tutoring center, tutoring is ASSISTANCE. I like to think that we are part of the solution, NOT the problem and I can provide many, many kids that absolutely agree. When my high school kids come in, we save them time getting work done and they go away with a clearer view of the subject that if they had worked alone or text messaged their friends for help. Ever since I spent 10 hours over two trips miserable, cold and wet “teaching myself” how to ski. Then spent 2 hours in a lesson and leapt forward, I’ve recognized the value of a few key “hints” from a skilled instructor. Tutoring is NOT a symptom of an over-worked, over-stressed, straight-A-oholic. Tutoring is one piece of the solution.